Leaving the past behind (an after 4x11 Rumbelle story)
by Rumbellecup
Summary: After Rumple is banned from Storybrooke, Belle goes through a hard time trying to get over Rumple. She wonders why he did the things he did, and comes to a possible explanation.
1. Prologue

Hey there! This is my first story on . The story is about Rumbelle after episode 4x12. The idea of this story was planned in my head as soon as I saw the last Rumbelle scene from 4x12, and I loved it so much that I had to give it a shot. Enjoy :)

Belle

As I closed the door of the shop behind me, and the familiar bell rang, all I could feel was this numbness state that had come over me. My eyes were red and dry, empty from all the tears that had come out.  
Now I was back, back in the shop, with its familiar bell that always told me I was home. The dusty, cozy smell from the old special collection reached my nose, promising the same. But none of it reached me anymore.

Slowly I walked through the shop, towards the house that had become my home so quickly.

Quietly I walked towards our couch, that was already so familiar to me, and I dropped myself between its pillows.

I didn't know what to do next. I didn't know if I wanted to keep living here, or that I had to leave. I wasn't sure whether I would take over the shop, or work at the library, or do something completely different. I promised myself I could figure it out in time and there was no need to haste. That gave me a little hope.

...

* * *

That was my short intro! Soon there will be more.


	2. Tea can burn

**Hey there, a sad chapter today. I feel quite bad for Belle, it was always her and Rumple against the world, and now it's like it turns out she stood alone. I guess that it will take some time for her to find her way through this.**

**Belle**

The smell of the tea gave me a lazy, cozy feeling. I had the cup folded between my hands since it was still too hot drink. I felt like I was in another world, just sitting there with the warm tempting tea that could not be drinked. It made me feel a little sad.

"How's the tea?" Ruby asked carefully, snapping me out of my dreamlike state. I was sitting in the cornertable at Granny's and the noise of chattering people reached my ears again. The little tea shop was quite full this morning, which made the empty spot opposite from me seem even lonelier.

"Yes, it's good, thank you." I smiled to her, although it was a bit forced.

"Tell me if you need anything." she said. I understood the double meaning of her words and nodded in response. Then she left me to take care of other customers. It was not that I didn't appreciate her kindness, but she would not understand it, not really.

Mindlessly I took a sip. The burning pain made me spill the hot tea all over myself: a reflex that only worsened the pain.

The spring morning was promising lots of flowers and sunshine, but instead it was quite cold and not many flowers were showing themselves. I walked through the park searching for those flowers. I plucked them until I had enough for a small bouquet. I bound the flowers together with a lint from my pocket and headed towards the graveyard.

The silence of the graveyard was quite an opposite from the crowdy tea shop and the big park. The silence was deafening, yet somehow peaceful. The only sounds I heard were my footsteps and the wind that was rusteling the leaves.

I signed a little as I stopped before a grave. I forced a small smile around my lips as I read the inscription: "Beloved son, Neal Cassidy".  
'It's been a while, Neal.' I said, as I kneeled down by the grave and layed down the flowers.  
'I know that we hadn't talked much with each other, but we both loved Rumple, didn't we? It always made us somewhat connected, in a strange way I mean.' I let out a soft laugh, 'Yeah, I guess now I can relate to how you felt when he let go of your hand. It's quite a sad thing, loving him, isn't it?'

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**_Chapter 1 part 2_ The adventure is starting! I think I will change the form to ****omniscient narrator because it reads better**

****'It's a good thing you thought of him as a hero in the end... He wasn't always this way.'  
Suddenly I realised something that hadn't crossed my mind before.  
'It doesn't make sense...' she whispered, 'It's not logic at all!'  
Rumple had always tried so hard to change for Neal and her. He was even willing to give his life for them and the other people in town. It just didn't make sense that Rumplestiltskin had such a drastic change of personality in such a short time. It couldn't be solely because of Neal's death. He would know that Neal would've wanted him to make the right choices, the heroic choices.  
No, it had to be something else and there was only one thing she could think of.

Once Belle was back in the library, she started going through all books that involved dark magic. It took hours to even scan all the works, but she kept searching, completely focussed on her job. By nightfall, Belle slipped down against one of the bookcases, while letting out a big sign. There was nothing she could find about the dark one. She did expected that, since the library used to be Rumple's property, but this was quite the let down.


	3. The sleepy beauty

Hey there! The new chapter is here! Hahaha. I hope you like it, this chapter will kind of explain the theory I'm going for. Yeah, I've got to give my Rumbelle-heart some hope since next episode is probably going to crush all the hope I have left of them. Oh, and thank you Grace5231973 for your comment! :)

**Chapter 3**

**"Coming back from the dead tends to do that to you."**  
-Mr Gold (4.11 Heroes and Villains)

It had been some long nights for Belle. Ever since that day she hadn't had a full nights rest. Therefore, the lack of sleep was starting to show, on both her face ánd behaviour. She had become grumpy and lost her temper faster than ever before.

'Damn it, where is it?' she hissed irritated to herself.  
For quite some days now, Belle had tried to find some secret place in the shop, like the ones the castle used to have. It was her last hope, after having gone through the whole library and the house. If he hid the books in the forest she wouldn't be able to find them anyway. Her long search however, had still led to nothing.

Now she was leaning against on of thedesk, irritated and exhausted, biting her lips in an attempt to calm herself down.  
She didn't feel comfortable in the shop.  
It was not because Rumple used to manage it, or because of all the good memories they had had together, but because this was the place she had found the real dagger. Just remembering those mixed feelings of pain of that moment again felt like a stab in the heart. She hadn't entirerly trusted him before, but at those times she had been mad at herself for not trusting her loved one. After he had even sacrificed himself for her and Baelfire, she thought it was almost like a sin to even think of doubing him. But all the signs she had been seeing were correct, even if she ignored them.

But that was the reason she was searching so hard for information for the Dark One. It was too strange that Rumplestiltskin had changed so much.  
She knew that he had become a better man, which didn't mean perfect, but better. He didn't kill anymore and started to help people out for a fairer price. That behavoir kept on until he sacrificed his life. That was that had been the most selfless deed he had ever done.  
After his revival, when everything involving the Wicked Witch had settled down, he started to change. It was only after his revival that he started to decieve and plotting those kind of plans again.  
That was why it had to be the reviving, that made him change so much. Looking back, it all seemed logic.  
Back in the Enchanted Forest, when they went to revive Rumplestiltskin, the spell had as goal to revive the Dark One. The difference between their goal and the goal of the spel must have had that effect. I could be, she thought, that the spell had made the Dark One in him stronger, harder to control. After how far he had come, what else could it be?

But now she was here and there wasn't anything in the shop, the house or the library that could give her a clue to what had happened and how she could fix it. She didn't even know who could help her with her problem, the one who solved all of the magic problems in town was the Dark One himself, and the fairies were all killed by Zelena.

Her head started to hurt. Just what she needed. Maybe a good night's rest would help her think clearly again. She didn't liked to sleep though. She was often haunted by dreams, that vary between an evil Rumple, that laughed his creepy laughter and attacked her without any regret and another Rumple, her Rumple, like she saw him that very last time, begging her with tears in his eyes to please not leave him alone.

She didn't know which one was worse.


End file.
